My mate's a striker, can run 100m in 12 seconds, broke his leg in Essex Cup Final for our school.. was a really hard game to carry on with that in the back of my mind..
I've played for Leyton Orient, Charlton and forgive me, West Ham.
And Theo, your friend's say you play like an Italian most probably means you dive, cheat, & moan when things don't go your way.
Only joking.