Angry Spurs Network FC Crushes Stevenage At Both Ends
guardianfootball.co.uk
Team captain DC76 said he prepared himself for this match by listening to Machine Head's "Through The Ashes Of Empires" album end-to-end. It must have worked because his intensity level was up a notch as Spurs Network FC beat Stevenage Borough 3-0. The shots on target tell most of the story - SNFC had 13 to Borough's 3. The Canadian captain was "terrifying" for the opposition, according to the opposition manager. Acting in stead of his immediate superior, suspended manager Daniel, Gary Mabbutt was quick to notice that something had snapped.
"Oh, he's still furious about the treatment of his manager and his teammate by the FA," the assistant manager said. "But he's turned that anger into a positive on the pitch. Not one Stevenage player even thought of going right at him, because with that glare on his face, they were all worried the guy'd murder them if they got too close! And they were probably right, but hey, intimidation factor can sometimes win matches! And of course, he ended up driving them all into dazzaTH, COYS or Berba's Right Peg, and they ended up winning the ball! The guy's got the demeanour of a rabid wolverine, and the fans just love it!"
The Canadian captain was quick to praise his linemates, as well as goalie Storts.
"We came out with something to prove," he said. "And we did. They would have had more decent chances if the flankers hadn't buckled down like they did. dazzaTH was perfect in the air, COYS won every challenge he made, Berba's Right Peg was his usual great self coming forward, but also stayed back when he had to and made those poor sods' lives a living hell, and Storts stopped all three of the decent chances they had. Everyone back here was on fire. I just did my thang."
At the other end, Rob continued his impressive goal-scoring streak, and although he didn't get a third hat-trick in a row, he did contribute. Fellow forward Dannyn99 looked right at home up front, both scoring one of the other two goals and making several key passes in the attacking zone, while attacking mid Biggs looked sharp as well, getting the third goal. The flank-backs COYS and Berba's Right Peg both got assists, the former from a great sweeping long-range ball into the box and the latter from a perfectly-placed corner.
Some Conference pundits are beginning to wonder if Spurs Network FC are going to lose at all in the foreseeable future in Conference. On top of that, the SNFC fanbase has really begun to take off. Among said fans are some members of the team whose fans make up SNFC - that is, Tottenham Hotspur - and there's something of a fan partnership developing between the two Haringey-based sides. Defenders Paul Stalteri and Michael Dawson and midfielder Teemu Tainio are among these. Other new celeb fans include Delerium/Front Line Assembly co-founder Rhys Fulber, Fear Factory guitarist Christian Olde Wolbers, DC76's fellow Victoria products Steve Nash (basketball star), Nelly Furtado (singer), and Bob Rock (record producer), and (rumour has it) Keira Knightley!
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